Showing posts with label Book Ramblings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Book Ramblings. Show all posts

December 13, 2009

Popular Article on How to Write a Successful Chinese Romance Novel, Part 2

Translation of the second part nearly drove me crazy. Very difficult to retain the humor.

Translation:

1.The right combination of words can make a huge difference in psycholagnic fiction. Try translating "I want you" into Chinese:
(a) I will have you.
(b) I must have you.
(c) You cannot escape from me.
(d) I will ask my father emperor for you.

Answer: There is no right or wrong answer because literature is not like math. I can tell you that all four options will work, but (a) definitely is the most bland. (c) the classic works better, and it appeared even in romance novels written by pioneers like Qiongyao and Xijuan--in addition, it attests to an indomitable spirit. (d), being the most "regal" and descriptive, wins over the other three.

2. A girl has to save her lover from danger. Which part of her anatomy is the most ideal location to receive an injury?
(a) Forehead
(b) Arm
(c) Ankle
(d) Chest

Answer: Only a man will choose (d), and someone who reads too many porn novels at that. In reality, both (a) and (c) are good. Since forehead typically suffers light injuries, her appearance won't be negatively impacted in anyway. A little blood might even improve her look, adding a touch of sex appeal. Sprained ankles, on the other hand, have the advantage of opening up more possibilities--for example, she will have now to be carried by someone [hint hint]. Finally, those of you who select (d), if you don't care for any more clicks, if you wish to end your story soon, and if you want to throw in some love-making scene, then this option works fine.

3. If for the first encounter between lovers the girl must have an area of her body bared, which should it be:
(a) Wrist
(b) Arm
(c) Chest
(d) Ankle
(e) Leg

Answer: Students choosing (a),(b),(c),and(d) should all be ashamed. Come on, (a) and (b) will show regardless of you selecting them or not. (c) and (e) indicate a predilection for pornography. Especially (e), did you think we are judging for Miss USA? (d) is the obvious answer here. It shows enough flesh to get people excited but otherwise leaves a lot to imagination.

4. What should a man give to a woman to show his love?
(a) Diamond
(b) Flowers
(c) Jade
(d) Chinese embroidery
(e) Grass roots

Answer: (a) and (b) are utterly vulgar! Students who chose these two should be ashamed of their bad taste.

Correct answers consist of (c), (d), and (e). (c) and (d) promote the Chinese culture. (e) likens love between ordinary people to grass roots, plain but everlasting.

5. The most acceptable form of handicap for a girl is:
(a) Dumbness
(b) Deafness
(c) Lameness
(d) Blindness
(e) Amputation

Answer: If your answer is (e), you are automatically flunked. (a) and (b) are the best because being deaf and dumb accentuate hardships in her life [which will supposedly excite protective and sympathetic feelings]; graceful fluency in sign language further keeps a man's interest glued.

Lameness and blindness need to be avoided because they don't look good. Unless she is blind but still manages to possess beautiful eyes.

6. Who below is the ideal prototype for the male protagonis?
(a) Xiang Yu
(b) Liu Bang
(c) A prince
(d) Jerry Yang
(e) Leader of triad/mafia/gang

Answer: All are fantastic except for (b). You do not want Liu Bang because he is a rogue and a philanderer.

7. Male and female protagonists should have the following combination of accents:
(a) Man: Beijing; woman: Beijing
(b) Man: Hong Kong; woman: Hong Kong
(c) Man: Beijing; woman: China south
(d) Man: Beijing; woman: Hong Kong
(e) Man: Hong Kong; woman: Beijing
(f) Man: Hong Kong; woman: China south
(g) Man: China south; woman: Hong Kong
(h) Man: China south; woman: Hong Kong
(i) Man: China west; woman: China west
(j) Man: China west; woman: China south

Answer: Dear students, don't be confused by the many choices. (c) is the only one that works. Hong Kong accents should be avoided like the plague because it is vulgar. A southern accent makes the man sound effeminate, whereas western accent makes him sound uncouth. A process of elimination leaves only (c).

Beijing accent in a man sound more masculine; southern accent in a female sound womanly and cute.

8. How many man should fall madly in love with your female protagonist?
(a) 1
(b) 2
(c) 3
(d) As many as possible.

Answer: A little red flower goes to the student who selected (d), because then the writer will have infinitely many candidates to choose from, female fans to hoot after the many guys, and also money for her book.

9. As another plot device, when you want him to let go of her wrist he is holding, she should say:
(a) Let go of me
(b) Let go
(c) Let me go (with a little bit of coquetry)
(d) Let go...(with a slight frown)...you are hurting me.

Answer: (c) and (d) are the better answers. The first for playfulness; the second to throw in some physical abuse that draws sympathies.

10. Gender combination for the lovers:
(a) M, F
(b) M, M
(c) F, F

Answer: Who chose (c)? I will refund 80% of your tuition because it pains me to know that you obviously haven't learnt anything from this lesson. Tell me, which female reader would want to read about two girls making out?

(a) is the obvious and most likable combination for both male and female readers. (b), on the other hand, is avant-garde. Novels with this particular combination simply replaces the girl with a boy, who always turns out to be a Farinelli to allow female readers to more easily identify with him. [Note: Presently (b) is a flourishing genre in China]

Related Post(s)
Popular Article on How to Write a Successful Chinese Romance Novel, Part 1

December 05, 2009

Read: The Twilight Saga

Author: Stephenie Meyer
Series: Twilight Saga

After being thoroughly disgusted by the second movie New Moon, I feel an even stronger urge to trash this book series, something that I itched to do for a long time.

Whatever faults it has in a literary sense, the Twilight series is undeniably one successful commercial venture. Stephenie Meyer understands human nature well--adolescents are slaves to their hormones, and all girls dream of being the next Cinderella.

To substantiate my point, I have to refer back to a post that I translated a month ago, "Popular Article on How to Write a Successful Chinese Romance Novel, Part 1," which touches upon a number of common tropes in romance fiction. Coincidentally, Twilight contains most of them.

Bella
1. To make the readers like the heroine, Meyer describes Bella as a ordinary-looking and slightly lonely girl.

2. In the series, Bella undergoes enough emotional and physical trauma to earn her the title "Survivor of the Year."

3. I am not sure how coordinated and fit Bella is, but Edward certainly does not lack any opportunities to rescue her from danger.

4. Bella stays a virgin until very late in the series.

Edward
1. In stark contrast to Bella the ordinary, Edward is an extraordinarily handsome boy.

2. Edward's vampiric nature means that he is strong enough to satisfy most female desires for a shining knight.

As befitting a young adult novel, there are at least 2 men in love with Bella, both exceedingly attractive, and a dozen others who want her for a number of reasons. Faced with so many stellar catches, Bella agonized over the choice she must make for a least one novel and a half--I suppose this is thoroughly satisfying to the female ego, especially for those who identify with the stories more strongly than other readers.


Now, having explained rather objectively (in my point of view) why the series is so hugely popular, I would like to point out why it is so ridiculously awful.

At the beginning I mentioned that the Twilight Saga is essentially a series of common tropes strung together. Well, this is also the reason for the abysmal reading it offers. For every Chinese romance novel readers (I can't speak for English readers), these plot devices are overused, uninteresting, and boring--unbelievably so. The entire series smacks of banality.

Furthermore, I fail to understand why Edward and Bella fell in the love in the first place. The dubious "meant to be" claim aside (I just got reminded that Edward loves Bella because he can't read her mind, which I had completely forgotten. Goes to show my love for these books), how does a rational being fall in love with his food? And by food I mean ambrosia. After all is this not how Edward repeatedly described Bella? I suppose that overcoming one's animal instinct in the higher power of love is another point designed to impress female readers.

The last two books of the series are even more ludicrous, tainted by the heavy stench of "Mary Sue," from Bella's sudden elevation of status to her miraculous contribution to vampiric procreation. By the way, for those who haven't heard of the term,

"A Mary Sue, in literary criticism and particularly in fanfiction, is a fictional character with overly idealized and hackneyed mannerisms, lacking noteworthy flaws, and primarily functioning as wish-fulfillment fantasies for their authors or readers. Perhaps the single underlying feature of all characters described as "Mary Sues" is that they are too ostentatious for the audience's taste, or that the author seems to favor the character too highly."

--Wikipedia


I have to say that despite of its gigantic success, the Twilight Saga is an insult to romance writing, even though this genre is already known for not requiring extensive cerebral activity to read.

Rating:
2 out of 5 stars

October 02, 2009

Popular Article on How to Write a Successful Chinese Romance Novel, Part 1

(Book Cover of One Romance Novel...are both of them guys?)

More accurately, the original full title is "Fast-Track Course on Writing of High Click-Through Rate, Psycholagnic Fiction" (Chinese: 高点击率的意淫小说之写作速成)

For anyone--man, woman, it doesn't matter--who is aspiring to become a profitable Romance novel writer in China. Or anywhere.

Note: What is happening now in the Chinese light novel publishing business is that most plots follow certain patterns, and this is probably true in other countries too. There are a few templates targeting female readership, and a few targeting the male readership. Not only are these high repetitive novels hugely popular, but such genres also have higher chances of being selected for publication. To date, the industry has already catapulted several post-70 and post-80 writers to millionaire levels (70 and 80 refer to the birth year)
...............................................................................

Author: Knight (Chinese: 骑士), "I" in the article
Translator: PH

The term "high click-through rate" refers to the wildly popular, frequently lauded, and often re-posted books one reads on websites like Sina, Tianya, or Jinjiang. The term "Psycholagny" (Chinese: 意淫, Yi Yin, or YY) refers to a special type of novel, often written by female authors, in which the entire story revolves around the emotional entanglements between 1 female and more than 2 male characters. I do not dislike these novels, which make the readers drool, the blood boil, and allow readers to gain certain gratifications vicariously. They add some rose-colored romance to people's mundane daily lives.

The ancestor of YY novels is Qiong Yao (Chinese: 琼瑶, Bio here). But Xi Juan (Chinese: 席绢, Chinese Bio here) is the person that can claim the most profound impact on this genre and the most significant contribution to the development of YY stories in China mainland. Two of Xi Juan's books, Climbed the Wrong Sedan Chair, Married the Wrong Guy and Love Across Time and Space, are veritable classics. And I am sure every single one of the girls here have read them (Boys, I am not referring to you)

To write a successful, psycholagnic fiction that enjoys high readership, one essentially needs to possess two personality traits. The first is imagination in abundance, and also the courage to turn these fantasies into words, no matter how ludicrous and farcical. The Key Word is COURAGE. I wrote countless stories about love between myself and Richard Clayderman at the age of 14, but because I lost courage and felt embarrassed about these fantasies, I can only stand by now as others publish their stories one by one and collect profit. The second important trait that the writer must have is the tendency to abuse the girl character--the heroine by definition revels in pain and perseveres. This virtuous quality is not to be scoffed at, because it is same in nature as the those shining characteristics observed on the persons of Yue Fei and other national heroes [and will naturally attract readers].

Yesterday, I read the novel Dream of Going Back to the Qing Dynasty (Chinese: 梦回大清), and loved it! Since I derived the idea of writing this crash course from the very same book, I shall use it as an example to explain how a female literary intellectual should go about generating a successful YY novel.

Book synopsis first: The book Dream of Going Back to the Qing Dynasty has as its backdrop the brutal fights for rights of succession among the many sons of Kang Xi, fourth emperor of Qing Dynasty. Those who read Er Yue He's (Chinese:二月河) Kang Xi Emperor will be no stranger to this period in history. The crown prince was Kang Xi's second son, but there are others who aspire to take the throne, notably the fourth and the eight sons. Each of them has his own supporters. #13 supports #4; #9, #10, and #14 all support #8 (PH: Yes, Kang Xi was a stud). The story is about a 25 year-old woman from modern China whose soul mysteriously traveled back to the Qing Dynasty and took possession of a Manchurian girl's body. She was so lovely that #4, #8, #13, and #14 all became madly infatuated after meeting her. After much internal turmoil the girl accepted the love of #13, who was motherless and much neglected when he was young and continued to be unlucky after he reached adulthood.

Now that the synopsis is out of the way. I will talk about character building in a YY novel.

1. The Heroine.
An heroine in the YY novels will typically be described as "not very pretty, but very special/unique". I can tell you straight up that this description is bullshit. The baseline trait for any heroine is that she must be pretty. By pretty I don't mean you and me pretty, but rather, stardom pretty. Authors like to use the particular phrase "清秀佳人" (good-looking lady), because it emphasizes both a pleasing countenance and a pleasant temperament. It also implies that the main character is not a bimbo, but has big breasts as well as a large brain. Or as the current fashion trend dictates, tiny breasts but a lot of brain matter, because camisoles and big chests do not go well together.

At this point the reader might ask, "why not just say she is beautiful?" The answer is: don't be such a stickler to details. What you need to learn is this type of highly advanced writing technique. What you don't want to do is madden the readers, who in the end are all ordinary, "not very pretty but very unique". So by using the same description for the female protagonist, we remove potential feelings of jealousy that readers might have towards the characters, as well as any obstacles that might be present when the readers try to identify themselves with the heroines. From the point of view of the writers, this is an classic move, because it greatly enhances the readers' vicarious experiences and hence enjoyment of the stories.

A second necessary trait for the female protagonist is that she must be spirited and lively, but she cannot be fat or muscular. The number I set down for weight is 50kg. If the heroine exceeds it, she is considered a pitiful fat girl, even if her body is well proportioned. Girls who weigh more than 50kg cannot survive in China. They can, however, immigrate to the U.S., where they will be considered petite and sweet. Their dresses there will all be size 0 or generally tiny, and everybody will praise their physiques...great for boosting one's self-esteem. So if you truly love a >50kg girl, send her to U.S. That's a paradise.

The third trait is the ability to endure both mental and/or physical abuses. We describe the two kinds separately.

First, mental abuse. When attending parties in the mansions of rich aristocratic ladies, the heroine will undoubtedly receive malicious and cold words. The right way to act in these situations is to be cool and uncaring, retaliating only when the verbal abuses go overboard. The retaliation must be swift and so well constructed that it cannot be rebutted in any way. I emphasize: the key difference between a female protagonist and a female antagonist is her caution, her ability to keep cool, because a good heroine knows how gossipy and maligning servants can be behind her backs.

Second, physical abuse. We are not talking about the basic "heroine getting beat up by female antagonist", but something much deeper. For example: in the Dream, when #4 is giving the girl a strangle hold on her wrist, the correct way to respond is to softly say "Please, let go. You are hurting me." This is one typical way to tide over the storyline. Another great one is the male protagonist "gripping my jaw", so that "I am forced to look up to his dark pupils." And due to all these "physical attacks," the heroin usually has many bruises, with neck, wrist, fingers, jaw, and other exposed areas wearing most of the damages. By the way, the girl must have a dainty wrist, because a dainty wrist excites powerful feelings in males.

In this aspect, Xi Juan did far better than most modern writers, despite of the fact she is one of the earliest players in the romance novel scene. Her characters always have hickies over their entire bodies, and the stock exclamation goes like this: "How can I walk out of this door tomorrow? It is so embarrassing". The tone here is also crucial, resignation warring with satisfaction. To prevent such embarrassment, Xi Juan later invented a clear, fragrant ointment as special treatment for hickies. Note: Tiger Balm is not okay in romance novels, because it stinks!

Fourth, although heroines possess admirable wisdom, their cerebellum should be extremely underdeveloped, even atrophied, so that they have a lamentable sense of balance. This is to ensure that in YY novels, the heroine becomes involved in all sorts of accidents--falling into a pond, stepping on other people's toes--thereby giving the males more than enough opportunities to save and hold her (remember, these accidents serve as preludes to sexier episodes). Beware, however, that the first time the woman is being held, the man must pause out of surprise (怔了一怔), and the woman will struggle to escape the embrace (挣扎着起来). When she turns her head to look at the man behind her, she will see him looking at her with great interest (充满了兴趣的凝视着我) . At this point, all experienced romance novel readers will realize that the heroine have captivated yet another male creature.

Finally, the most important trait of all: the heroine must be an innocent, also known as virgin. Why? Jia Baoyu summarized very well in the famous Dream of the Red Chamber, girls are pearls prior to marriage and fish eyes after. My understanding of this greatly deepened after reading Dream of Going Back to the Qing Dynasty. Before that girl married #13, I read very carefully. Once they married, I started skimming. The moral is, my dear students, if you want to maintain a high readership number, delay weddings till the very end! Dream of Going Back to the Qing Dynasty has provided us with an example of what not to do. Don't repeat it!

Last word of caution. Sex scenes must not be vulgar or graphic, because we are after all female literary intellectuals. What we can write about is "roughness" (not "rudeness"), "perspiration", and "pain". Take care to emphasize this masculine strength, because it contrasts nicely with the feminine willowy gentleness.

2. Male Protagonists
Usually these novels will have male character #1, male character #2, and male character #3. Whereas we can never say the heroine is beautiful, male characters have to be as handsome as humanly possible. In addition, male character #1 and male character #2 must be the opposite of each other. Here are some combination for thought: if one is playful, the other must be mature; if one is young, the other must be experienced; if one is full of enthusiasm, the other must be glacial; if one is direct, the other must be roundabout; when one "has my wrist in a viselike grip" in full view of everyone, the other must have "my wrist in a viselike grip" while no one is looking; when one claims loud and clear "I must have you", the other will say in a low husky voice "I want whatever he wants", and the list goes on. (The truth is, translating this ultra-long list is too exhausting= =||).

Faced with so many excellent catches, the heroine will sincerely agonize over the choice she must make, instead of gloating like the rest of us shallow creatures.

When I was reading the Dream of Going Back to the Qing Dynasty, I did not care so much for the status of the male main characters, who are sons of an emperor, nor did I did feel overjoyed at "being loved by such an important man". But, then, I started associating the characters with grandsons of Chiang Kai-shek and Mao Zedong. Wah, I thought, Chiang Kai-shek's grandson is so handsome (interested persons can google his photos). Mao's grandson...ha...ha...ha...you know the weather is so nice today.

Imagine, my dear students, that there are at least 4 men like Chiang's grandson who are smitten with you and promised to cherish you. Readers with less self-control will probably drift to the sky. The substitution/association effect is that powerful.

Now back to the male main character. Because his lover is accident-prone, he must be very sturdy, as not to suffer any deformation when he gets squashed by, sat on, stepped on by the heroine, or when trying to rescue her. He must have dark arresting eyes, so that he may gaze meltingly at her for prolonged periods of time. Although he loves her to the exclusion of all else, he must have personal ambitions or be accomplished professionally, and his life before she came along should be full of hardships and difficulties, in order to draw out her motherly instincts. He should maintain the same level of enthusiasm throughout their lives together, because it is not right for the heroine to be bored to death just because they married. He also has to be strong; this is the only way to make so many "marks" on her body and to "lie atop of her like some mountain" (一座无形的山一样压下来). Mostly importantly, the male main character must acquire disease or injury at least once in the book, only to be faithfully nursed back to health by the heroine. All of these are indispensable elements of a YY novels, and students should definitely commit all to heart if they don't want to waste their tuition.

---------------------------------------------------------

The main content ends here. Next will be a short quiz (plus solutions).




Popular Article on How to Write a Successful Chinese Romance Novel, Part 2
 
Veggie Discourse - Blogged